It ain’t over till it’s over

28

28. December 2015 by swissfitchick

Hey, Loves.

I am back. Did I just say that? Before the start of 2016? Give me a virtual pat on my shoulder, will ya?

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Never did I intend to be missing in action for that long, but oh well, life has its own plans – I was hit by this insight this year more than I was comfortable with. I turned 37 in May this year and in my younger years, I was convinced that by that age, I will be knowing it all, I will be over everything and I will be that wise ass, that chilled and relaxed lady and I will be so down to Earth that my feet would be glued to the solid floor I would be standing on.

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Except it never turns out the way you think it does. It ain’t over till it’s over and that is probably not going to happen until I die. I am fine with that.

Quick update to give this post a point (I swear I have one, getting there eventually):
– I quit my job at CrossFit Basel
– I am on vacation in SoCal with Laura right now and will be moving on to Sydney for all January and I don’t have a job so far
– I did not relapse despite the rough times
– My trainings are amazingly strong and consistent
– My friends have been and still are close by my side
– I am still blonde
– I am still clumsy
– It makes life funny
– Life is too important to be taken seriously
– I competed at the World Championship of Powerlifting in October in Italy
– I spent more time in Spain
– I passed my IELTS exam with a 7.5 as I said I would
– I still eat too much chocolate
– I am still obsessed with champagne and prosecco

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Spain October 2015

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So…. nothing incredibly new here, except the job thing. You all know how much I loved my job, the box, the people and how passionate I was about it. I still am. But some work relationships simply do not work out. There was that one relation that made it impossible for me to stay and I am very sad about it. I, or we tried to make it work, but at some point it was over. This leave feels like a break up and I am still processing the whole thing. Good for me I get to do this in sunny California with my American Bestie. There are not a lot places I would rather be right now.

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What will the future bring? I have no fucking clue. I will be back in Switzerland by end of January and so far there is no plan. In all honesty, I am not even keen on making one. I am getting my shit together right now and I am moving forward, I have no fear – I do not think that any impact in life has ever been able to stop me. Yet, I do not know what I am going to do – and that’s fine.

I know that I am being judged by people for being in my late thirties and still not settled. Sometimes, I do crave a settled life. A partner, a family, a home. Especially after rollercoaster years like 2014 and 2015, I feel like I had enough adventure. By now, I know I am strong enough to handle it all. So maybe Universe, it is ok to give some easiness?

Joshua Tree National Park

Joshua Tree National Park

No doubt, some of the crazy shit that happened were my own choices. We create our own luck or misfortunes for that matter, so I am to blame myself for some events here – yet, I do not regret a thing, I never have. Regrets are unnecessary, given the fact that you can not change the past anyway. It is all about how you rise, how you use the experience for your own growth, how you digest it and how you move on. Drowning in self-pity is wonderful for a night with a girlfriend, lots of booze and junk food, but that is over the next day and on you to take the next step.

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Agrigento, Sicily, Italy

Cleaning up my diet is ON

Cleaning up my diet is ON

And hey, I scored a 8.5, a 8 and a 7.5 in my IELTS English exam (9 is best) which I am pretty stoked about. And…..in the end, all that matters is your friends, your health and your home. I have all of it and I feel rich. I actually have some of the most brilliant, lovable, funny, reliable, strong and smart people around me and am happy to call them my best friends. This is amazing. I also have my beautiful flat back in Switzerland which I share with a genius Operasinger from Italy and we have the best time. I am able to wake up healthy every morning and go for a kick ass CrossFit workout – this is a blessing.

SDFPF Powerlifting World Championship 2015, Sicily /Italy

SDFPF Powerlifting World Championship 2015, Sicily /Italy

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There is so much to be grateful for. Whining is necessary sometimes, but always with a pinch of humour. For me, life threw so many challenges at me the past two years, it felt absurd and I realized that the only way to make it through is by not taking it so seriously. So, in this spirit – keep on smiling, giggling and cracking silly jokes.
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I am back and you are still here.

Thank you.

xxx
Luce

28 thoughts on “It ain’t over till it’s over

  1. gonzolupe says:

    I am very glad to see your last posting. I’ve been following you because years ago, I tried to lose weight and did so very successfully but every time I looked in the mirror, I saw a huge fat man looking back regardless of how little I actually was. I stopped trying to lose weight and actually gotten quite large. I want to get back on track soon but have been working on my ‘demons’ so I won’t go back to where I couldn’t ever be happy.

    I applaud your triumphs and am sad when you falter. Understand, I’ve not once been disappointed with your struggle…I know we all have it and I am grateful that you have shown us that it can be dealt with.

    I wish you well and success in all that you do.
    gonzolupe

  2. Yay for being back – back to blogging, back to me. I think you should just say Phuket at the end of Jan and meet me in Thailand. Phuket… get it?

  3. Pat says:

    All I can say is you go girl! Glad you are back and content. Happy 2016 to you.

  4. Philipp says:

    Thanks a lot for this blogarticle. You found the way I always propagate. Life is here to be easy and full of love. Enjoy it as long as possible.

  5. Sarah says:

    I’m glad you’re back! To celebrate your return, I might have to bake some more Basler Brunsli cookies…

  6. I’ve missed seeing your face around the blogging world❤ But I'm glad to see that you're still showing life who's boss with a kickass attitude. I can totally relate to craving a more settled life sometimes, but it'll happen when it's supposed to happen. And if it doesn't? Then life can still be freaking fabulous.

    PS – you should totally hit up Canada during your travels😉

  7. teampbj says:

    I can’t tell you how happy I was to see an updated blog!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Here’s to a kickass 2016!!!!!!!!

  8. For a hot second I thought you said you were MOVING to Sydney! That would have been KICK ASS – but then again, if you don’t have a job … Then you can do ANYTHING!😉

  9. calista says:

    I’m so very glad you’re still alive and kicking. I’ve missed reading your posts. I adore your bubbly outlook on life! Here’s to making NO plans and seeing where life will take you. Keep smiling and laughing and bubbling🙂 xo

  10. Yay! I loved reading what you have been up to for the past wee while – love that you are just enjoying the adventure and the ride! And who knows what might pop up when you are in Sydney🙂

  11. You are such an amazing motivator and inspiration. I have missed reading your posts, and this is exactly why. I’ve been going through a lot of shame with not being where I thought I would be by this time in my life, and its a mean struggle to fight those bullying thoughts. But whoever made up those notions of what success is or when you should be “settled” was completely off the rocker. I like your way much better. THANK YOU.

    • Oh I feel you! I have these days, when I am like:’Nothing achieved.’ – it is not true and we both know that. Life is what we made out of it – settled or not, it’s on us to make it fabulous!!

  12. oh my dear. It was amazing to see my chicken stuffed swiss cheese pop up in my Bloglovin. Your strength is incredible.

    It definitely ain’t over. Especially because a fat lady hasn’t sang…yet.

  13. I love seeing you in my Blog reader again. It makes me happy because you are fabulous.

    Also, I don’t think we’re ever really settled in life. As soon as you nail one thing, another curve ball will come your way. At least that’s what I’ve experienced. What matters is how you choose to tackle those obstacles and you always do it with the most amazing attitude. You are fantastic.

    Welcome back.

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